How To Stop Giving Up On Yourself: Set Goals That Matter
If you are having trouble meeting your goals, stop trying to figure out what is wrong with you and start questioning whether you are setting the right goals.
Society will tell you that you need to look like the girl on the Sports Illustrated cover, have the 3,500 sf house, and spend your vacation time traveling the world.
If the thought of achieving those things does not have you bursting out of bed in the morning, it is perfectly ok to ditch those goals. Your goals might include a little more wiggle room in your waistband so can sit comfortably without secretly unbuttoning your jeans, feeling more of a sense of peace and calm in your home, opening your credit card bills without crying, and having the time to go to the grocery store by yourself.
Some people will call this “playing small.” I call it setting goals that matter and letting your goals grow along with you.
It is fun to dream big and push yourself to grow, but if your goals do not feel attainable or do not represent happiness in a way that you can relate to right now, you might have a hard time putting in the work needed to attain those goals. I know I have found myself thinking things like, “Well, I wasn’t built to look like that anyway, so why torture myself with this diet?” or “I don’t need to be rich and famous to be happy – I have everything I need already – so why waste time working towards more income?” These are the thoughts that keep you small. Setting attainable goals that address what is making you unhappy right now, allows you to bust out of the rut that you are in and start working towards something bigger. Achieving an attainable goal strengthens you and prepares you for your next goal. Eventually you will realize that you are actually working towards your biggest dreams, and you will feel more empowered to go after them.
No dream is too big; no goal is too small. Allow yourself to dream big and set attainable goals that address the areas in your life that are currently holding you back.
Set health and wellness goals that matter.
When you put a photo of a VS model on your fridge or set a goal to have six-pack abs by summer, you might reach for the tub of ice cream and say “Screw it. I’ll never have THAT anyhow” and dig right in. Each workout does not get you all that much closer to six-pack abs, so you think “What’s the point?!” and give up.
You can set a goal to lose five pounds so that your pants button easier, to ditch a pop-drinking habit for more energy in the evenings, or to drink more water and eat more veggies to reduce bloating and have a healthier gut. Start with the changes that make you feel better rather than setting goals that make you feel worse about where you are at today.
Set wealth goals that matter.
You can set a goals to be debt free, buy a boat, give more to your church and retire comfortably instead of a goal to make millions and travel the world. Financial freedom means not having to worry about money. This does not necessarily come with more income nor with constant pressure to cut spending. Think about what you want your money to do for you and create a plan to make that happen. Cut wasteful spending, send your money to work automatically, pay off haunting debts, and increase your income in a way that makes sense for you.
Set mom-life goals that matter.
You do not have to be Joanna Gains, throw Pinterest-perfect birthday parties, or serve all-organic, homemade everything. You can just want a peaceful home that allows you to live a great life and spend your free time enjoying your family. Minimalizing your home and turning your chores into simple routines gives you time for the things that make you happy and keeps your mom-duties from holding you back from your other goals.
Give yourself permission to set goals that really matter to you.
Comparing yourself to others is a waste of time. Take a few minutes to think about what you really want for your life and set attainable goals to work towards those things. Use these prompts to help you get started!
What are the five most important things in your life? Do your goals reflect those things?
What does your ideal day look like?
What distracts you from enjoying your life now?
What do you daydream about?
What would you do if you were suddenly given $1,000,000?
Write down ten things you are grateful for and that are going well for you and ten things that you would like to be different.
Set five-year goals and break them down into one-year, one-month, one-week, and today goals.
For any goal with a number tied to it (income, weight, size, etc.), where did that number come from?
Let your goals grow with you.
No dream is too big; no goal is too small. If a goal is too small to be exciting, go bigger, and if your goal seems out of reach right now, set something more attainable. Goal crushing is a habit. As you accomplish something that makes you proud of yourself, you will build momentum to go for the next goal.
What is one goal that you can set and commit to? If you found this post helpful, share it with your accountability partner along with a goal you can crush together!
